Future plans and current fears

It's been a while in planning...what will be  my first race back after having Liam?? 

When I was pregnant, I thought maybe I'd be able to run the Austin half marathon in Feb (about 2.5 months after Liam's debut). After he got here, I knew there was no way I'd be ready that quickly - physically or mentally. 

So what should I shoot for? After some thinking and talking with others, I decided on Buffalo Springs Lake Triathlon (BSLT) 70.3. I had previously signed up to race (twice) but circumstances made it so I couldn't. It seemed like a good race to choose since I'd wanted to race it for so long.

The problem? This is a REALLY hard race. It's at the end of June in Lubbock, so it has the potential to be brutally hot. It's quite hilly, both the bike and the run. And, it will be just about 8 months from Liam's birth. Will I be ready for this?

Most days, I feel like I'll be ready. I've been doing pretty well with weekend training (I just rode 60 miles last Sat and ran 10+ miles the previous Sun). And my weekday runs have been good too. But, my swimming has been lacking and so have my trainer rides during the week. There have definitely been some really great workouts where I've surprised myself. Maybe I'll surprise myself on race day!

Since my training has been less than consistent, I do get worried at times. BUT, I'm not worried enough to miss out on spending time with Liam. He comes first, not training. While I know that people have raced on less training than I have been doing, I occasionally question if it's enough training for me.

I'm still not sure how BSLT will go down. I know that this doesn't have to be (and almost certainly won't be) a PR race, I don't want to be disappointed or compare myself to my pre-pregnancy race-self. Things are different now, but I still have that old mindset. I really need to figure what will make me happy at the end of the race. And I have just about 2 months to do it...

Updates

It's been a while since I've updated y'all on things, so while I have a few min I will.

Liam arrived on Saturday, Nov 23, 2013 at 6:38am. He was 8 lbs 5 oz and 21.25 in long. We went into the hospital on Thursday evening and he took his time showing up for his big debut. When he finally decided he was ready to meet us, he was gorgeous. We are so amazed by him. He is a healthy baby and so very happy too! He's growing so quickly. I can't believe he's already 3 months old! Monday was his first day at day care. I had a harder time than he did I'm sure.

Training is steadily picking up. I didn't really do anything except some walks until Jan 1. I started with a short little run and have worked my way up. There were a few setbacks (body moving back into some semblance of normal), but I think I'm back on the way to training. While I was off work, Liam let me get in a few trainer rides. I was able to get in some running when Patrick was home and able to take care of Liam. I haven't been able to figure out the swimming part yet though (I've only swam twice since he got here). I'll figure it all out soon. For now, I'll get done what I can. I'm not worried. The only race on the plan so far is the Rock and Roll Marathon in Dec...plenty of time to get back in the swing of things.

Still waiting!

Today is Liam's due date and we are still waiting for him to make his debut. He is apparently very comfortable inside my belly. 

I'm sure this is a normal feeling, but I was so worried the whole time that he'd come early (pre-term). I kept checking the pregnancy calendar website to see what chance he'd have if he came at 30, 33, 35, etc weeks. Every week that passed meant he had a better shot at making it without much, if any, assistance. Now, at week 40, I'm ready to kick him out. I want to hold my baby so badly. 

If he doesn't show up on his own, I'll get some help on Friday. I'd really prefer not to get the help, but I will if I need to. We'll see. 

In the meantime, I'm still working and every day is harder than the day before. It takes me longer to stand up after sitting for a while. I'm more out of breath (that was supposed to change the closer I got to his due date), even when just sitting and talking. And sleep is even harder to come by too. By the time I get to sleeping well, my hip or shoulder falls asleep and I have to roll to the other side. It's a process for sure.  

As hard as this has been and become, I have been VERY lucky. I haven't had any real problems or anything. Minor annoyances really. I wouldn't trade this time for anything. 

I'm so super excited to finally meet this little guy. Hurry up Liam!! There are so many people ready to meet you!

34 weeks!

At 34 weeks, Liam is now about the size of a butternut squash (according to the internets). That's crazy! I have this wriggling, hiccuping, punching and kicking little boy in my belly and he's the size of a squash!? How does he have any room at all to move??

It's really starting to get real now. He'll be here in 6 weeks, give or take. I am so excited to meet him, but I'm also completely freaked. What if I can't do this? What if he cries and cries and cries and I can't figure out what he needs? What if I'm not a good mom and somehow mess him up for life? I know all these fears are normal, but it's still hard not to freak.

There is so much to do. I feel like I have tons of time to wash clothes and sheets and set up the baby stuff, but I really don't. Everyone in baby class talks about how long it takes to set everything up and it's starting to scare me. What if he comes early and we don't have everything done?? I think as long as the car seat is installed and the bed is set up, we're good. He won't really care about toys and decorations and other such stuff. As long as I can get him home safely, we'll be good. The rest can come later. I'll just have to get stuff ready a little bit at a time.

Belly shot!

Getting ready

I'm almost 38 weeks and Liam could potentially come at any time. It's just crazy to know that I'll be holding my baby soon after so long.

Now that I'm in the home stretch, I've been getting things ready for his arrival. Today I did some last minute shopping at Target and Babies R Us. I think I've got everything I NEED, but if not, Patrick can go get whatever I forgot. All the new clothes and stuff are washed and ready to be worn.

Can't believe how small these are! 

We also got the Pack and Play fully set up and the car seat docks installed. Now that those 2 things are done, we really are ready for Liam. If he came tomorrow, we'd be good to go. I'm hoping he waits til after next weekend because I want to watch one last movie...the new Thor comes out on Friday and I really want to see it! But you know, I REALLY want to hold my baby so I'll be stoked if he comes early too!!

Let's play catch-up!

Well, I've made it to week 33 (of 40). Everything is progressing very nicely! I've been so very lucky in this pregnancy - I haven't had very many problems and the doc said my latest blood work was great! WOOT! I'm hoping all the good news and experiences continue for the next 7 or so weeks.

I'm still missing those bikes and runs with the girls, but mostly I've been ok sleeping in on Saturdays and Sundays. I know before too long, there won't be much sleeping at all!

I think things are finally catching up to me though. The swims this week were much harder than they've been in the past. I had a harder time breathing and I was slower than usual. I was still able to do the distance (2300 on Wed and 2600 on Fri), but I was more tired after. I know this isn't training for a race and the speeds don't matter, but it's still hard to see the difference.

I'm also dealing with more pregnancy aches and pains than before. I have this one little pain between my ribs that's really bugging me. I know I've been lucky so far, so I'm not letting it get to me. I mean, it could've been so much worse. Even if this pain lasts til the end, I'll be grateful that it hasn't been as bad as others have had it. 

On the up side, we've gotten to see Liam's face in two 3D sonogram sessions. (I'm not putting pictures in here, but if you'd like to see some let me know and I'll share.) He is such a cutie! I know I'm his mom and that all moms think their kids are cute, but still. CUTE! I can't wait to meet him and hold him. All his moving around is just so cool. And painful sometimes. ;) He will be here before I know it. I'm so excited!

Relay Adventures

Small Texan relay was just a few days ago, and Kris, Orissa, and I did so well!

Race morning was totally strange. Most race mornings, I'm super nervous and have a hard time eating anything. When I woke up Sunday, I was fine. I had been a little nervous on Friday but nothing like usual. I gathered my little bag of swim gear (another weird thing - no bike or run stuff!) and met Kris at Whataburger to carpool to the lake. We chitchatted our way out there (that's when I found out about Kidd Kraddick). 

We got to the lake and, once again, it was weird to only have one little bag of stuff to carry. After body marking, we went in transition to set up Kris's bike and scope out where the chip exchange would take place. We even took a minute to have our friend Roland snap a pic.

I hurried to the water to do a quick (like 3 min) warm-up swim. I hadn't been in open water since IMAZ in November, so I just wanted to make sure I remembered what to do. Plus, I knew the boat dock would be slippery so I wanted to check for a good entry and exit point. 

After the pre-race meeting (strangely, I could tune out most of it), the men got in the water. Women and relays were set to go off 5 min after the men, so I had a few min. All up to this point, I hadn't been nervous. As soon as the men got in the water, my heart started pounding and the nerves hit me! I told the girls, who both said just have fun. If I wasn't feeling fast or good, just treat it as an easy swim and have fun. I gave the girls a hug, said "Good luck and have fun!" and went down to the water.

When I got in the water, I stood to the left of the group (only about 15 or so ladies and relay swimmers). I thought "Good...it won't be packed so I shouldn't get my belly kicked." And standing off to the left, I thought I'd have clear water (which I prefer over following feet anyway). Turns out, it was great. I didn't have any problems once the swim started! 

My goal for the swim was to push hard. I wanted 28 minutes but really I would've been happy with anything if I felt that I had pushed myself hard. I hadn't realized that Roland was racing until we saw him in transition. We are always so close in the swim, so I came up with a new goal...try to catch Roland. I knew with him having a 5 min head start, it'd be pretty impossible, but I wanted to try. 

When the gun went off, I let the group go and took a few seconds to get myself situated. I set out to the first buoy and settled into a rhythm. I noticed a yellow cap (relays wore yellow, ladies green) and thought "Just keep that cap in sight." I really wanted to look at my watch but resisted. It was just a regular watch without GPS so I would've just been seeing an elapsed time. It really wouldn't have helped and maybe it would've made it mentally harder.

Buoy after buoy, I just kept that yellow swim cap in sight. The cap got a little further away as the race got longer, but it was never TOO far away. I kept pushing hard and I knew that whatever my time, I would be happy. I still hadn't looked at my watch so I had no clue how I was doing.

The boat doc came into sight and I thought "Woo hoo, I'm doing this right!" I found my way to the right of the dock and used the little bit of gravel next to it to make my way out of the water. Up the ugly, green carpet to transition. I made my way to Kris and saw Orissa standing there too. Orissa grabbed the chip off my ankle and passed it to Kris. (I'm so glad she did because I would've been hard pressed to bend over at that point!) As Kris swapped the chip, I stopped my watch. 31:15!! Kris took off, and I yelled at her to smash the bike. I couldn't believe that my part was over already!

At this point, we were 31 min into what would probably be about a 3 hour race. Now I could recover and chill with Linda, Orissa, and Brian. While Kris was out on the road, we all just chatted and talked about random stuff. We were keeping track of the time and when it got close to an hour 30 (Kris's estimated time), we really started getting ready for Kris. She came in at 1:32 and we were so excited! Way to go Kris!! You totally crushed yourself and the bike course!

Kris and Orissa quickly swapped the chip and race number, and Orissa took off on the run. Now it was time to chill with Kris, Linda, and Brian. We did more chatting, and before long, it was time to go up to the dam to watch Orissa come in. Kris, Linda, and Brian ran a little way down the dam to help run Orissa in. I stayed at the finish line and was able to yell at Orissa as she crossed. It was so awesome to be there at the end to see how hard she pushed herself!

After getting some food and water and waiting about an hour, it was finally time for the awards. Brian had gone over to see if he could see where we had come in (if we didn't place, we didn't have to wait anymore), but only swim times were posted. We thought we had gotten 3rd, so we stuck around just in case. Turns out, we did get 3rd! We were less than 2 min away from 2nd place. The 1st place team was made up of 3 male Marines, so they were 20+ min ahead of us.

I am so happy and grateful that my fabulous friends Orissa and Kris were willing to join me in our very first relay adventure! I had a great time and would totally do it again. Thanks ladies!!